Endings and New Beginnings 11 December 07

This is the day of the Jupiter Pluto conjunction in Saggitarius, initiating a new twelve year cycle in social trends. The conjunction lands right on my natal Mercury, Juno and Chiron, bringing expansion and transformation to whom I am as a writer and teacher (Mercury), healer (Chiron) and wife (Juno).  Right over the conjunction, my copy editor,Tristan, appeared with a fully edited manuscript of my latest book, The Amethyst Heart: Healing the wounds of separation. It is a book of healing power for all who have experienced trauma, and fully expresses my nature as a wounded healer (Chiron).

Above all, my manifestation as a wife is being totally transformed as Sadananda and enter a new phase of our journey as spiritual companions. If the course we have set turns out to be the true course, then our days of cohabitation are over and Sadananda wil enter a new life a householder yogi, in partnership with Matrupriya. It is scary and vulnerable to allow my almost twenty eight year relationship with Sadananda to enter the unknown. The unconditional love and friendship are palpably present, yet the new form is veiled in mystery. A cherished life experience of dwelling with my beloved as partners in the life of vanprasthrashram comes to an end and a new phase begins. And I know that Matrupriya, Gabby and Sadananda are all faces of the Sole Beloved.  

I am "dating Lord Shiva" with a view to marriage; in other words,  I am seriously enquiring into the potential that at this time I have recieved a call to sannyas, total renunciation within a celibate path. How great is the kindness of the guru, who will stop at nothing to bring about awakening! How many times I have prayed, "Whatever it takes! May I be of supreme benefit to all sentient beings, whatever it takes!" And the guru has taken my prayer to heart and blessed me with this doorway of change, challenge and growth, arising in inconceivable ways.  

It is an ending and new beginning for Alandi Ashram as well. This precious little abode of light arose from the love and dedication of two people who came together to create a space where we could live a life of sadhana  (spiritual practice) and seva (selfless service). During this transition, it appears that the ashram will in the future be held by me, by Ma, with contributions of service and energy from Sadananda, as will unfold. At this time, I am called to hold the vision, to keep faith with the dream, in all my daily actions of seva. From the seed of light that I water and tend, a renewed ashram will spontaneously arise as a beacon of love for all seekers and fountain of peace for every weary heart.